John Cena is yet another World Wrestling star who makes the leap from ring to movies and does a pretty impressive job. With his disarming and soft-spoken ways, he’s part Vin Diesel while looking like Quarterback Tom Brady. That said, one can only wish his movie was as good. In this, Detective Danny Fischer (Cena) has a new life, a new house, a new dog and a new wife (Ashley Scott). Enter Miles Jackson (Aidan Gillan), not exactly the guy you want over for Sunday dinner. He’s got a history in drug trafficking, espionage, murder and dirty bombs in Paris. But when Detective Danny botches up an arrest that puts Miles in prison and accidentally murders his girlfriend, Miles wants revenge by kidnapping Danny’s wife. On the anniversary of his girlfriend’s death, Miles manages to escape prison and set up various strategic attacks on (of all places) the city of New Orleans (as though Hurricane Katrina wasn’t enough.) In the form of a game of “round one” all the way to “twelve rounds,” Miles plots out drop spots and bombs to test Detective Danny’s skills. As the plot really kicks in, so does the vertigo kick in given the shaky camera work of Director Renny Harlin. (It’s been awhile since he’s had a hit so clearly he’s forgotten his directing skills. “Die Hard 2” was in 1990.) Five rounds would have been more than sufficient. Apparently Miles has the ability to mastermind far-fetched plots that are hard to imagine given the fact he’s been only out of prison all but five minutes. Even more mystifying isn’t his fake employment for Homeland Security but the fact he can get new cell phones and replacement sim cards by the dozens. I don’t know about you, but I’ve never been able to get the attention of a sales rep in a busy mobile store without - at the very least - an hour’s wait. Two tiaras (and that’s just for the cute wrestler.)
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