(rated PG-13, 2 hrs. 20 mins.)
A Jedi shall not know anger. Nor hatred. Nor love. Nor in this case, acting. Seems there’s another sort of Star War going on inside “Star Wars: Attack of the Clones”: the one between the actors and their (utterly terrible) dialogue. Long gone are the magical days of Harrison Ford and Carrie Fischer as Han Solo and Princess Leia. Now you have the try-to-take-them-seriously Natalie Portman, as Senator Padme, whose life is threatened by political separatists, and Hayden Christensen, the young Anakin (who will someday turn out to be Darth Vader). Their laughably stiff love scenes play like Day One of a soap opera audition. Ewan McGregor returns as Obi-Wan Kenobi, who has transitioned from apprentice to teacher, and the one guy who can act, Samuel L. Jackson, is underused as Mace Windu, a peacekeeper. The real stars of this movie are clearly the creatures and special effects. (R2-D2 is back.) But it’s Yoda (the voice of Frank Oz), the little green Dalai Lama type, who steals the show, especially with his unexpected Kung Fu scene. Too bad it’s a little too late. This second installment in the trilogy of Star Wars prequels is heavy with exposition. Even somebody who saw the first film will be lost, including all the toy light-saber owners camped out on sidewalks for tickets. In fact, there are probably enough fanatics, curiosity seekers, and marketing-driven kids to make this wearying cartoon of a movie a monster hit. But if you’re looking for quality, well, “The Force will be with you,” all right — enough to send you fleeing from the theatre!
