(rated PG-13, 110 mins,)
Why they are on Mars who knows, but a bunch of astronauts led by Val Kilmer, and one woman, attempt an expedition, now that Earth is becoming a dying planet (sometime in the near future). Better to have named this “Mission To Mars” (oh wait, that title’s already been taken) for this two hour sci-fi-action-horror-thriller (take your pick), although comedy wasn’t intended in the mix despite it’s over dramatics that make it amusing. After a carnival ride in a bouncy ball when their space ship fails, the guys land on Mars with only 7 ½ hours of oxygen. Gallagher (Val Kilmer) is the heroin who most believes in this mission, Burchenal (Tom Sizemore) is Mr. Personality, Santen (Benjamin Bratt) is the cute one leaving a harem of girls at home that stay in touch through virtual mail, and Pettengill (Simon Baker) is the party animal gone serious. Carrie Anne-Moss plays Commander Kate Bowman who is stuck on the ship giving all the warnings and shouting commands. She engages the help of a R2D2 kind of Robot named Amee who gets a little too Jackie Chan with the men when her computer chips go haywire. The guys spend much of their time sitting around Mars discussing their issues, random dialog and stupid sentiments on life while ice storms and roach creatures ascend upon them. If you’re gonna be stuck on Mars it may as well be with Val Kilmer though most of the movie was spent deciding what was more annoying: The flashbacks, the echoing robot from the space ship or the funky hidden gadgets that are there for storyline convenience than for any other reason. And, just why is this called Planet red? Beats me.
